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Manuel offers:

daily meditations for seekers of Truth
RAMESH S. BALSEKAR:


"For the egoic being the outer world is seen as the face of an enemy.
The disruptive dualism from which all conflict arises is not in the outer
world but with the false perception
of the pseudo-entity who fails to see the world as his own reflection."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

MELODY:

A rhetorical question.....

What if Life is served by my unconsciousness
in ways we cannot begin to imagine or understand?

Is this not the question that underlies faith? Faith that, in our
unconsciousness (or 'not knowing') that there is a greater
Unfolding at play....that there is a Movement in Life which
...when surrendered to.....when enfolded into.....ends both
suffering and doubt.

Yet faith can be replaced with knowing ..... in retrospect -
in looking back over the events of a day, or a month, or a
lifetime....

looking with a wide enough lens.....one can see that
one has always been carried by the Flow of Life.

We just may not have recognized it at the time.

The question is, for me, what is it that inspires us
to awaken to this Flow....to be conscious of it
*this* moment....right here, right now, rather
than waiting for that acceptance...and melting
... in 'retrospect'?

The first answer that comes to mind is that
suffering ends. Yes. I have found this to
be so. But surprisingly this is not my motivation.

Some mention service, and though that
may be true as well, it doesn't strike a bell with
me either.

Looking closely I see that this draw to be Conscious, for
me, is more about Breath. It's about Living fully.

When I am Conscious, all the smells and colors and sounds
and touches are so much keener.

When I am Conscious, there are no restrictions, no inhibitions,
no fears or doubts.

When I am Conscious, my body moves delightfully, insightfully,
even rightlyfully.

When I am Conscious, there is no 'me', no 'you', no resistance... no
'work' to do!

This desire to be Conscious,
when I get deep down honest....

is my most self-ish desire of all.

Funny, isn't it..... that such a selfish
desire could lead to

it's own demise?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

MARCIA:

.............There are internal consequences to external
behavior. In fact, to internally accept the feelings engendered
by external events and not manifest them, creates a friction
which can fuel awakening. Acceptance of feelings is feeling
them. Anything else is dissociation.


HANS:

This looks very tricky ( at least to me). Accepting a feeling means that in
fact you are not accepting the feeling, otherwise the feeling to accept
would not arise. I wonder what really happens with a feeling that comes into
being without being obstructed at all. My guess is that it would fly away
into the air.
The only thing one can do is to see that ones does not accept a certain
feeling. Nothing more can be done.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Adi Da:


..... After a time, I got up from the floor. I walked around and beamed
joyfully at the room. The love-blissful, unthreatened current of the
"Bright" emanated freely and unqualifiedly from my heart, and not a
pulse of It was limited by my otherwise conditional existence or the
existence of the world. I had acquired a totally new understanding. I
understood Narcissus and the entire cycle of suffering and search. I
saw the meaning of my entire striving life to that moment. Suffering,
seeking, self indulgence, the seeker's spirituality, and all the rest
were founded in the same primary motivation and error. It was the
"avoidance of relationship". That was it! That was the chronic and
continuous source and characteristic of all egoic activity. Indeed, the
ego was revealed to be "only" an "activity", not an "entity". The
"entity", the separate "person" (or ego-"I"), was revealed to be only an
illusion, a mere presumption in mind and feeling, resulting from the
self-contraction, the egoic reaction, the single egoic act of the total
body-mind. The ego, the separate and sepatative "I", is the chronic and
total psycho-physical avoidance of relationship. Thus, human beings are
forever suffering, seeking, indulging themselves, and manipulating their
lives for the sake of some unknown goal in eternity.


ANDREW responds:

There is no separation, how can there be relationship? Ego is the activity of
separation OK but saying this is avoidance of relationship is speaking from
ego's
perspective. Without the ego activity there is no relationship, there is no one
to
relate to, no one to relate. One does not relate to oneself unless one is
split, one
only relates to other. Da wants it both ways, either he doesn't understand
where what
he's saying leads, or he's being dishonest.


DAN:

Relationship is total,
hence cannot be lacking.
'Your' appearance in time, and 'my' appearance in
time, is only time itself.
Relationship is Synchronicity,
without any gap or distance.
Timelessly, there is only
time as synchronicity, beginninglessly
undivided.


ANDREW:

With no gap or distance, with no separate entities, how can there be
relationship?
Relationship is connection. If there is no separation there is no connection.
Response, resonance, not relationship. In unity, here, now, there is no
relationship.
Relationship is not possible without the separate 'I'.


GLO:

Yes, I have similar questions with all this. Without a boundary of me/you..the
place
where we are separate is what allows us to meet. This talk of I am you and you
are
me..makes a nice Beatles song..but what is the point of at least phenomenally
having
separate "I's" and eyes..if not to communicate with other "I's"..how do I
relate to a
you who is actually me if we are identical? (And why all this trouble people
have
gettting along?)
I get how you are God and I am God, but in practice, you sit somewhere else
typing
letters to a bunch of other "eyes"... Please try once more, Dan to explain
this?


DAN:

One *is* two,
and two *is* One.
It's not One against two,
nor two against One.

It seems that it's easy
to get One, but difficult
to get two *is* One.

When two or more are gathered
in my Name - I am there ---


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

MARCIA:

The difficulty with rational, logical discourses is that they are all in
the head. Round, and round, and round and......... one
dimensional.

Where is the heart? And the life situations? We all eat, we brush
our teeth, we feel lonely sometimes, and joyful at others. We get
scared at funny noises. We have questions about what is right and
how to do something.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

MIGUEL-ANGEL:

From Krishnamurti, I have only one quote regarding
freedom:

"In observation one begins to discover the lack of
freedom. Freedom is found in the choiceless awareness
of our daily existence and activity."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

MIGUEL-ANGEL:

For a nondualist, who sustains that everything
appears in Consciousness, and that there is only
that One Consciousness, there is no such thing as
free will, because all individual body-minds are not
real entities, but mere appearances without
substance. Where there is no real doer, there cannot
be a free will.

DAN:

Nor can there be any entity anywhere, hence
what can be said to be determined by what?
Determinism implies causation, and with no
entities, what causes what?


MIGUEL-ANGEL:

Free will does indeed require an independent entity.
I'm not so sure about determinism. As you say,
determinism implies causation, but I don't quite see
why causation implies an entity. Why can't a part of
the projection be determined by the whole of it or by
the source of the projection?

<snip>

......... it seems clear that Nisargadatta saw
the Absolute as the causeless cause of everything, and,
within the world of phenomena, that each change is
produced by the whole and affects the whole.

On the other hand, if phenomena are not caused what
makes them appear? Pure chance? I've never seen
anything else grow on peartrees but pears. Why the
invariable constancy?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

DAN:

Isn't it Something?
One Being as all beings,
One Awareness as all variations of awareness,
One (No-)Thing as all apparent things?

There's no distance,
and what appears as distance
is just an agreement to
an idea of distance.

Sometimes I'm asked why I started
all this space-time stuff.
I answer, why not, it never created
any *real* distance...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

LARRY:

What I mean by truth is phenomena. I sort of insinuated a distinction
between truth and knowledge; truth being what is, and knowledge being
what we know about it. A phenomenon is you or me or Hillary or apples or
oceans. All these things truely exist right now. That we can't find them
through analysis tells me there is something wrong with the anaysis.
What can we find? You say nothing and that makes you happy. I say hmmm.

DAN:

I find myself.
Then there is nothing more to find.

Analysis can occur, but where it occurs
is never known, is itself the unsplit Unknown.

Thus, it's not that analysis can't occur, or shouldn't
occur - it's that the entire context has "changed".
There can no longer be the assumption that analysis
reveals "truth" - only further material to be
analyzed.

Wholeness, Allness, Totality, Being -
"This" can only be "revealed" now -

Analysis takes time,
nowness is timeless...

Draw your own conclusions!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

DAVE:

Destiny exists ultimately in the NOW. Any past event is written firmly,
any future event is also written. We just don't know what it will be.
We can say that it turned out to be distinct from what we guessed it
would be. We can change what it will be "at will", but we are actually
only changing what it was predicted to be. It finally is what it is.

What does that say about free will however? What a beautiful balance
these two things have. Sort of like a conscious structure ever in balance.

I cannot change what "will be", but what "will be" is what I make it.
How far can this go? What are my limitations in will?

Could it be, that the strongest will wins? Some higher will, may determine
that my "time" is up for instance. There's not much I can do about that!
Something more down to earth; I could decide to make a million bucks!
You just have to go and do it! I've tried to do it a couple of times.
It's not easy, I came upon some life`s decisions that I wasn't willing to
compromise, so I chose those over the million bucks.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

DAVE:

I have done a lot of work, looking at the edges of consciousness, looking at
where consciousness disappears. Each new discovery moves the boundry. Dreams
become more lucid, life becomes more like a lucid dream. In the end there is
one big lucid dream or nothing at all. In a timeless world, the two become
one.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

GLO:

I was in that twilight of almost waking up where you become aware of your
dream. My
subconscious mind and conscious mind were discussing "emptiness is form; form
is
emptiness" and I was simply observing this discussion between them with
interest to
see who had what sort of insights or information to impart to the other. We
were all
enjoying this very much, all three of us giggling at one another. When I woke
up I
felt such a tenderness towards my subconscious for wanting to join in, perhaps
because I seldom have experienced such a direct perception of it.

Lately, many of my dreams seem to resemble a kind of discussion forum in which
conscious ideas are being "worked on" or deeper questions asked about such
topics as
I think about consciously during the day. I am really enjoying dreaming because
I
feel like I am learning or absorbing understandings into a deeper level of my
being.

OTOH, sometimes I still have 'nightmares' about my previous job.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

ED:

The "world of time" is beginningless and endless, since
there never was a beginning or end of time. What appears
to be a beginning or end is just a convenience of the
mind to "explain" the duration of things. Continuity is
forever in time and in timeless time.

Time marches on.


DAN:

Time is beginningless,
hence it never began.
Never having begun,
it takes no time.
The timelessness of time
is the nondurational
nature of everything.
Wake up!
The march of time is
over before it began.
Don't try to hear this tune,
you don't have time.
Instead, of waking up as soon
as you can, wake up timelessly.
Now, without duration or choice.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ANDREW:
When the balloon breaks there's no longer any relationship between the air that
was in
the balloon and the air outside, it's all homogeneous air. Relationship is
always to
or with some other. We have to make ourselves separate for there to be
relationship.
There is no 'I' to be alone in non-separateness. When we are each other, there
is no
relationship between us. Relationship is experience, it only exists if we
interact as
separate individuals.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

GLO:
Yesterday afternoon, we were driving over this two lane country rode to a
nearby
town, when we stopped behind some cars for a schoolbus. (Yes, it looked real to
me.)
This retarded boy stepped off to be met by a white-haired old man. As I watched
their
backs, walking towards the house hand in hand, I spontaneously burst into
tears. To
be witnessing such tender love....ahhh... this happiness lingered and then
wafted
away, still the visual image as memory lingers on and re-appears, like now and
it is
a form of happiness.

The other side of this admittedly sometimes over-sensitivity, or
over-reactivity is
seeing harm or negativity where often others do not. It's a curse I live with.
It
also makes me difficult to live with and more difficult for me to function "out
there" in normal life.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

JODY:

It makes sense to associate personality with the mind, which
also remains after realization. But personality is more than
mind. There is something "personal" about it. Even after
realization, it remains "us" too, especially to others.

[]

Personality learns that its true role is being the navigational
system, that it serves the Self. However, there is concern in
the context of personality *for* personality. The "I" appears
to get dragged along into it. That is, no matter how much
access there is to Self, you come right back to that pain,
which doesn't go anywhere until it is felt.


JODY (earlier)
> The fact that we *are* the Self, realized or not, demonstrates
> just how close our sense of self *is* to the Self. That is, when
> we think to ourselves, "Who are we really", we can be assured that
> something in the response--something that we perceive in that
> moment--*is* who we really are. Maybe some folk have yet to
> discern it, but it certainly is there, in everyone, no matter
> how much "ego" they have.


MICHAEL:

When I saw IT in 'me' I also saw IT in 'others'! Compassion! :-))


JODY:

Well then, you got one on me. I'm not seeing It in others on
a regular basis, even while I know It is there. No. . .I take
that back. On occasion I *do* see It in others, in the form of
a smile or some other insignificant gesture. However, I don't
see It in everyone all the time. I suppose it's something I
can look forward to.

[snip]

Let go, let go, let go. It's a burden at times for me. I'm
losing my interest in my world. All I think about is the Self,
but very, very few of my friends do. Lately I feel like the
world is spitting me out, and it's sad to that part of me.
Poor, poor me. Kvetch, kvetch. Yadda, yadda, yadda.

MICHAEL:

Ouch!

I just started crying.
I am crying now!

It hurts!
So much!

I am crying for my life and the pain of my life.
I am crying for all the children that are treated so cruelly.
I am crying for the anguished mothers.
I am crying like I have never cried before!

It hurts!

I am crying because I need to feel the pain!
I am crying for the lonely fathers.
I am crying for the inconsolable.
I am crying for the innocents caught up in cruel wars.

I am crying to know the answer.
I am crying because there may not be an answer.

I am crying for all of the reasons and unreasoning of being a human.
I am crying and crying and crying.

God, it hurts so much!

The tears!

The gut-wracking sobs!
The endless heartache!

The snot!
Oops, a smile.

I do not know what is happening to me.
Why the extremis emotionalis?
This feels like a purging.
All of those cruelties and injustices
in my life....in life, ah ah ow ouch hurty hurty.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

MANUEL:

A NET of JEWELS
daily meditations for seekers of Truth
RAMESH S. BALSEKAR


"Spontaneous, true action happens naturally when there is no "you"
checking whether the action conforms to your own idea of what's best for
you."

(and)

"Human beings have no independent or autonomous existence whether they accept
the fact
or not. And whether they like it or not, they are being helplessly lived
within the vast totality
of an imponderably intricate creation over which the have absolutely no
control. "

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